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I Can't Find My Cape

by Cantor Dust

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    artwork by Dave Twigg

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1.
Blackened circles crept up from the ground, nobody saw them coming Radiating out without a sound It was black and cold and cunning Took half of the city by surprise Yeah nobody saw it coming Emanating terror from its eyes Nobody saw it.... Reaching up and grabbing from behind Enslaving all of the peoples' minds Taking half of the city by surprise Emanating terror from its eyes “I guess we gotta call the only guy we know I hope the motherfucker shows or else I don't know where we'll go” When he heard the call, his back was slumped against the wall A bottle in his hand, sworn to preserve the safety of his land He tried to stand a second time he tried to stand And crawled on the ground...
2.
We used it all His patience, his kindness, his ability to fly and to save us all He was a boy of no boundaries, we'd thought until we'd gone and we'd crossed them all. Now there's molten fire flying from the sky and it's gonna fry us all Where is our dedicated saviour? Our dedicated saviour...
3.
I can't find my cape. Don't know where it stayed Don't know how I'm supposed to save the city I'm a disgrace I can't find my cape. It's keeping me awake Don't know how I'm supposed to save myself I'm a disgrace I can't find my cape. No it's keepin me awake And I'm gonna admit to you that I'm afraid You see I'm terrified of the afterlife. Are god and the devil gonna wrestle for my soul? I apologize that we're all gonna die I couldn't find my cape to save my life
4.
Potion 04:03
I can remember so many days just like the last Structures of our civilization still in tact The imminent fear of death en masse had yet to become a matter of fact Memories of sitting round and getting high Coarse across my mind and I remember how we'd always fantasized We'd rather fancied seeing ourselves as we'd survived Imaginary catastrophes would never scathe our precious lives To apocalyptic topics we'd succeeded to desensitize our minds Somehow we'd gotten in our heads that we'd be some sort of exception When some kind of mass destruction served its unholy function As though the wasteland of the aftermath would somehow house its dreamy masses waiting gleefully for everybody to start back from their scratches Turns out most of us were wrong.... Empty world around me makes me try and find a way to move along Let us pretend for a moment, that I'm brave and not afraid to die I'll lock my lips with death and I will look her in the eye Craft me up a potion that will help me take advantage of this sudden gallantry Have it augment my body in ways of which I could not dream I need wings. Lasers shooting from my fingertips. Move through time, control minds Appear invisible to everyone that I meet, shooting rockets from my feet I recognize that in these times you may not have what you require to make me what I'd like If that's the case then craft me something that will take away my fright. All my life I have never shown courage in the face of the unknown So if I'm to do this without any drugs, you can be sure everything is fucked. (Every inch of my whole body is quaking with fear.  How did I end up being one of the last people here? How did I survive so unqualified through all those times. Through all that destruction Was it just luck? Then everything's fucked)
5.
Silently everyone watched the sky, wondering if their waiting eyes would find some sort of light Typically in troubled times like these, the hero's light would never miss a beat and never miss a fight The saviour on whom people used to depend, now at the very real end was nowhere in sight The sky above seem to stay blacker than hell, but the people stared all the while bathed in fright For once they were on their own, their best chance of survival let them down They sent a desperate call out to all the other heroes around What about Hydrophobic Man? He could drive the water from the ground What about Soft Man? Last seen in the arms of Laser Girl What about Spice Man? He could keep these demons from out heels What about Christ Man? Might be time he died for something real What about Soup Loving Man? Where is Lava Man? Paranoid Man's door is always latched. Marionette Man's got strings attached Where is Carpentress Woman and the Duck-Billed Five? Are the Bee-Stung-Lipped Seven in their Secret Hive? Surely Jet Pack Lady must know of our plight. Why can't the Flying Sharkmen use their gift of flight? Is Built-In Flashlight Boy still in the dark? Is Seldom-Awake Boy still have narcolepsy? Are we crazy to expect a saviour? The power of my neighbour pales against a Hero I fear my safety now... if I can't find Soup Loving Man
6.
“You gotta help us Hydrophobic Man” screamed the terrified mass of people fleeing the land “Our city and our lovers have been torn to shreds, now we're running for our lives with all the strength that we have” As though with a wind down from heaven he sailed through the sky Drawing ever closer to the tortured cries He saw the expanses of earth that he'd known his whole life Unrecognizable and about to die. And when he finally reached the people that'd screamed his name He saw that the ground all around them was crawling in the same sort of sickening way in which it'd crawled right before embedding half the world with relentless pain. Hooray Hydrophobic Man If he can't do it, no one can! “Reach up high, grab on to me. I am here to set you free. I'll take you safely through the air, and we can find somewhere safe” And they began to leave behind six hundred million hateful watching eyes The blackness began to ascend and to the hero's dread It's tendrils pulled the mask from atop the Hydrophobe's head Exposing him for who he really is. Corrosive darkness returned to the ground A dozen rescued people found themselves airborne in some kind of levitating charm. The hero's eyes watched the threat recede. While a dozen people stared at him, his face no longer shrouded in mystery. The beating of his heart increased in syncopation with his fright Fight or Flight? Was this it? His identity had lost all its intrigue And all those he'd released could not fail to see His real eyes... And all of their lies.... And in a panic In an instant It'd happened in the span of a breath All of the people that he had rescued Had fallen straight to their death Why oh why Hydrophobic Man? Why oh why Hydrophobic Man?
7.
She told me dying felt just like an aphrodisiac Whispered soft kisses on her paling neck And as she slipped into a sleep thick as the clouds above She told me dying had been teaching her the language of love Not all that long ago she said “Baby we've got to go so far away from here. We can find another place just as nice but twice as safe from harm. Baby we're so tired. Our souls and our bodies are so tired But at least we're still alive for now. This time I think, my lover, just walk away this time.” “Come on little darling. We've saved them from this mess So many times before now. Come on little darling, this time let's just save ourselves.” I could not say yes. I had to clean up my own mess people died because of my carelessness.
8.
Something's lost on me Why do lies feel so free? People died because of me. Why do I feel so free? Now the world's on to me. I tried to hide my identity. People died because of me. Why do I feel so free? Dear love I don't know whether to stay. Dear love I don't know where to go.
9.
If Ever I had needed faith something to keep my conscious safe now's that time. They told me Jesus would ascend the soul Fire carry the tobacco smoke Up to god Who'll absolve me of my sin? Who'll lead me to die and start again as a child of the Light? If you will please recondition my heart I will tell the world how great thou art You have my last words In whom can I quickly believe? From whom the punishment I receive Will reflect my piety I know I've probably been blind To all those who've been giving signs I need something now. I know that I must reap what I've sown But it truly petrifies me, the thought alone That some style of afterlife falls after my time has come and gone. Years have passed with crimes of the mind left unchecked. All of the while, up until now, up until now. In my imagination, the actualization of death Had always come as a sort of blackness And very little more Than a lack of perception. Before this storm has passed Bringing me to death I must ensure that my sins are in check Ghosts in the afterlife stories I'd thought illusory Might just be as real As people all seem to feel I was never taught to forgive myself So I'm begging now for something else Outside of me, in which I'll try to believe From whom forgiveness I'll finally receive. Absolve Me Give me Resolution Absolve Me I'll Pray. I'll Pray.
10.
Council 04:14
Let's say we try and save you all Convince this fire not to fall Return the darkness to its home, Would you feel less alone The next time your dying days arrive? Let's take a look at where we're at None of you've learned anything from the past You hide inside all day from the light drug yourselves to sleep at night Do you think you're doing well? You still believe in antiquated gods damn those who disagree to hell Do you think you're doing well? Oh we empathize. You must be terrified You have just realized that you're about to die. About to die We need you to understand Why we've chosen not to lend a hand
11.
This Machine 05:08
You have elevated us to be just like gods. You have made yourselves our children. Where did we as parents fail? We are also frightened That you might give us grandchildren. No! No! Cut it off.... cut it off.. This machine you made must stop. This machine you made must stop.
12.
No my friends, my time must end. The lights from the fires in the sky have made me close my eyes I'm afraid that I couldn't find you even if I tried My mind's haze grows Thicker as the shadows flow Across my withering skin As my carcass waits for me to give in I accept that we didn't win. This is my final sin. I'm already Dead. I'm surprised we lasted so long, so wrong. Didn't we evolve to become something unfamiliar and frightening? So unfamiliar and frightening.
13.
He turned around And he found All this time, his hero's cape was wrapped around his neck. He thought aloud, wrapped in his shroud, That he was no more safe from harm than the rest of this dying crowd The surface of the earth had become Blacker than the missing sun And soon the sky melted from his eyes And he knew that the end of it all Was nigh. When from on high From above the dissolving sky A voice entered his mind It said “Fear not my child! Wipe that terror from your mind Nothing happens to you once you die

credits

released January 1, 2015

Cantor Dust: Mark Klassen, Jeff Konwalchuk
Choir: Emma Hay, Josh Bright, Justin van Damme, Matt Ferber, Naomi Audia, Paolo Riva, Samantha Booth, Scott Reid, Signe Knutson, Anne Marie Willot, Natanielle Felicitas
Additional Vocals: Natanielle Felicitas, Ashley Jonasson
Cello: Natanielle Felicitas
Artwork: Dave Twigg

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Cantor Dust Winnipeg, Manitoba

The avant-prog, surreal storytelling project Cantor Dust is singer/pianist Mark Klassen, accompanied by electric cellist Natanielle Felicitas, currently exploring the emptiness that surrounds us as we float through space in search of light.

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